No one likes to be dumped for another person. Let's be honest - even if the breakup is ultimately for the best. Of course it hurts at the time when the Other Woman/the Other Man comes out of nowhere and drinks your milkshake. No matter how secure we are, there is not much defense to, say Angelina Jolie coming along (Sorry, Jen Jen).
That's why I hope my darling wife Donna will see this post and understand that it's not about her. There is nothing she could have done differently to compete with my new girlfriend Verna. (Click to make larger, if needed)
Come on! Her name is Verna first of all. Yes please. Secondly, she not only works for the post office, she runs Zip Code 45105!!! Lastly for now (I'm sure I'll discover many other things I love about her down the road) she is 91 years old which is right in my wheelhouse. We can talk about all the things we have in common as we clear the chicken soup dishes and get ready for bed at 7:30 each night. Sigh.
P.S. By happy coincidence, today is the anniversary of the creation of the U.S. Postal Service! It was in 1792. I bet Verna was so hot then.