"On March 4th, your vote will decide who will be in the White House to pick up the phone when it rings at 3 AM."
By now you have likely seen or heard about the above ad promoting Senator Hillary Clinton, which ran this weekend in the latest primary states of Texas and Illinois. Will they be enough to stop the Barack Obama Express? If you haven't seen it, please watch as I have some questions.
1. Is that scary music playing during the commercial from Saw 2? Or the Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Jeez, it's a phone call, not a Zombie Invasion.
2. Why is the mom in the ad checking in on her kids at 3:00 a.m.? Just getting in from a big night of whoring around? Or did she sense that the phone was ringing at the White House, presumably hundreds of miles away from the ad's target cities of Cincinnati or Houston?
3. Wait, why does the Senator from New York have so much more foreign policy experience than the Senator from Illinois? Not because she is married to the guy who used to answer those 3 a.m. calls I hope. I mean, I'm married to a fashion designer but that doesn't qualify me to advise Jennifer Aniston on what to wear on the red carpet.
4. Why is Hillary fully dressed in a suit, wearing makeup and jewelry at 3 a.m.? Did she just come in from a big night of whoring around too?
5. Most confusing to me: If the message is that Senator Clinton is the better choice to leap for the phone call in the middle of the night to handle that urgent global crisis, WHY DOES IT TAKE HER SIX RINGS TO ANSWER??