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Movies

April 22, 2008

Strongly Worded Letter #7

22 April 2008

NBC Universal
100 Universal City Plaza
Universal City, Ca.

Attn: Jeff Zucker, President & CEO

     Congratulations on the weekend's big box office for your new movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall.  I went to see it and as long as you keep giving Kristin Bell roles you'll be getting more of my business in the future too.
      However, I could not have been more disappointed with one completely unnecessary minute of the film. I know comedy is subjective and maybe others will object to the coarse language or the nudity but it's safe to say most people who go to an R rated  movie expect that these days.
     But how on earth did a scene where Jason Segal's character Peter knifes a pig to death end up in this movie? It came completely out of the blue and  was so tonally out of step with everything else in this otherwise light, romantic comedy as to ruin an otherwise festive outing. Is there anyone who finds that kind of gratuitous violence against an animal funny? Do you?
     Don't misunderstand me. I recognize that people eat pigs and I've even seen them, just like in this film, cooked in the sand at a Hawaiian luau before. But don't they deserve to die as humanely and as with as much dignity as possible, even in a movie, and not appear to be chased, caught and slashed to death for "entertainment?"
     Thank you for your time and attention to this customer's concern.

Respectfully,    



CC: Ron Meyer, President & COO, Universal
        Nick Stoller, Director, Forgetting Sarah Marshall
        Jason Segal, Writer, Forgetting Sarah Marshall
        Judd Apatow
, Writer/Producer, Forgetting Sarah Marshall

April 06, 2008

Actually, I Prefer Rosemary.....

In the last few years the media have placed more emphasis than ever on a new movie's opening weekend box office. If you are not #1 or at least made more money than predicted in your first three days in the theater than you are shamed and ridiculed as a failure.

Leatherheads6 I saw several articles online yesterday suggesting that the  apparent #2 finish of  the new movie Leatherheads, about the early days of professional football in America, might be some sort of backlash toward its writer/director/star George Clooney.

Here are a few sample comments from readers left on one of the Hollywood news sites, some edited for length and/or decency:


"I could never understand the 'Clooney is a movie star' assertion. Just saying it doesn’t make it so. Hollywood’s fawning over him is sickening. His smugness is unbelieveable. I cannot sit in a theater and watch him in a movie. His persona in films seems to be misogynist. When he held a press conference to rage against the press after Princess Diana’s death - My GOD! The guy’s arrogance is breathtaking. Who does he think he is? He’s a goddam TV actor. This is why Hollywood is so f***ed. When you’ve got TV actors thinking they are auteurs, we’re f***ed. This probably explains why his movies make no money. Why would the average Joe spend 10 bucks to see this arrogant actor when he may lose his job at the factory tomorrow? Sorry to rant, but Clooney has been bugging me for a while."


"The Ocean’s movies STUNK! George Clooney is a monotone, a talentless f***! And his political rants just reveal more about his lack of character and egotistical need for attention."


"George Clueless - please, you couldn’t pay me to go see one of his bombs. I can’t stand him, when I have, by accident, seen him try to act, it was stiff and uninspiring. When I see he is in a movie, I pass right by.

Hollywood just gets weaker by the day. I am not interested in their politics and views of the world. I just want to be entertained when I go to see a movie, not lectured to. I want to see actors who view their careers as acting and don’t pretend their wealth and limited education gives them credibility in science, economics, foreign affairs, etc."


"It’s always a delight to see the work of a self-annointed priest from the propaganda office of Hollywood, the left-wing Vatican, fail miserably."


"I’m sick of arrogance and Hollywood actors who deem to lecture me on the wisdom of their political beliefs. They are actors and they need to shut up and act. At one time Hollywood made timeless movies with great stars who were talented and larger than life. It’s gone now, and we’re left with vapid intelligence and arrogant actors lecturing those they consider the unwashed. Pathetic. I won’t see a George Clooney vehicle, ever. Box office is the only thing Hollywood gets."


"Clooney is ANOTHER of the undereducated/uneducated of Hollywood who try to tell the rest of us how we should think and live. These jerks forget that there are more folks in flyover country than there are in New York City or LA. WE determine who is going to be a box office draw and WE decide who won’t make it at the box office. It’s the sycophants in Hollywood who cannot say NO to a no-talent hack like Clooney."


"I’ve never seen Clooney in anything and I plan to keep it that way. For some reason, he just isn’t appealing, but I can’t comment on his acting. I abhor his personality so I will never see anything he is in. Hope this helps."


Leatherheads_poster_3 And on it goes for literally hundreds of posts. Do you think they're right when they suggest that Clooney's movies are being boycotted due to his crazy political views? If so, what about the eight movies he's been in that have grossed over 50 millions dollars in the United States? Or do we only boycott the ones we weren't going to see anyway?

Look, I didn't make it to Leatherheads because like millions of others in the target demo for this film, I had  the NCAA Final Four Tournament to watch for seven hours yesterday!  For other potential customers, maybe a sports film set in the 1930s isn't that appealing. Plus there have to be a lot of folks that very much dislike looking at Renee Zellweger's scrunchy face.   

If you are among the boycotters, I totally back your right to make the statement with your wallet that you will not voluntarily support someone's art whose politics you disagree with. Please help me better understand your parameters though:

1) How much formal education is required before one's opinions are considered valid? And are there any people with multiple degrees who are just as wrong?   

2) If an entertainer is equally outspoken politically ("in your face" came up a lot on the boards) but shares your views, is it also offensive?   

3) Besides actors and singers, what other occupations do you stop patronizing if you know their views differ from your own? Do you switch dentists? Stop rooting for a sports team? Go to a different Starbucks?    

 

March 17, 2008

Bonjour Pascal!

I am rather embarrassed to admit that I had never heard of The Red Balloon until last year when it was suggested to me by my Netflix account. Their computer thought I would enjoy it based on other films I had already rented. So I put it in my queue and last week it arrived in my mailbox. We watched it Saturday night. Yep, 1950s foreign language films is how we roll on weekend nights at our house.

Redballoonimage338    

From Netflix, "In The Red Balloon, a boy spends a magical afternoon chasing a red balloon across Paris. Albert Lamorisse directed this charming story and cast his 6-year-old son Pascal in the lead role, creating a memorable fable about friendship and loss..."

This 34 minute film is essentially dialog free yet, curiously, Lamorisse won the best Screenplay Oscar for it in 1956.

I mentioned it to a few people this week and found out that I am the only person I know who didn't see it (or doesn't remember it) as a child. Donna was eight, she said, and I think she enjoyed it as much the second time as I did seeing it for the first. Whimsical, magical, charming, with an ending that I certainly didn't see coming. If you have young children I recommend it highly.


Whitemaneimage

On the same DVD was another of the director's acclaimed films, the 47 minute White Mane, also new to me. This gorgeous black and white movie from 1953 is the story of a boy trying to tame a wild horse in the marshes of Camargue in southwest France.

I would not recommend this to the very young as a fight between two horses is quite violent and difficult to watch. Otherwise, it is a beautiful movie with another remarkable and unexpected ending. Oui oui s'il vous plaît!! 

So what little gems do you love? What unheralded movies for children would you recommend to the other readers? 

   

January 28, 2008

America Is Lost. Or Is It?

"Tough guy Sylvester Stallone's comeback as film action hero Rambo narrowly missed the top spot on its opening weekend in North America, box office figures showed.

Stallone's blood-splattering turn as a renegade Vietnam war veteran took 18.15 million dollars according to preliminary figures from industry tracker Exhibitor Relations.

The follow-up to the classic 1980s film trilogy sees the 61-year-old actor, in the title character's trademark headband, fighting genocidal forces to protect Christian missionaries in the Burmese jungle." (from wire services)

If you went to see Rambo this weekend, then I have a question for you. What are you doing? Seriously, that was not a rhetorical question. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Rambo_3

(Click to enlarge.)

I didn't see the movie but then I haven't seen any of the films in the series. Am I missing out on something entertaining? Is this Rambo movie, in fact, awesome with awesome sauce on top and I am just  an ignorant big fat loser? It wouldn't be the first time.

January 19, 2008

Me And A Million Other Guys....

Cloverfield_posterThe title of today's post refers to the number of bloggers who, just like predictable ol' me, will be writing about the new film Cloverfield today. It opened yesterday after several weeks of breathless chatter and feverish anticipation.

If you think you might see the film then please come back to this post afterward and add your thoughts but you must STOP READING NOW if you do not want any plot points spoiled.

But for the rest of us now, here are Ten Things I Thought About During Cloverfield.

1) Don't they make tripods for cameras anymore? This largely hand held shot film makes Blair Witch Project look like a still life painting of a bowl of fruit.  I know people (Hey, Princess!) who would never survive a screening of this movie with stomach contents intact.

2) Also, where do they sell those video cameras with batteries that last for 24 hours of almost constant stopping and starting shooting?

3) I'm glad I don't get invited to parties like Rob's going away bash because if I walked in the door the average attractiveness of the room would dip 40%. Doesn't that crowd have any friends who are fat? Or just average looking?

4) I did see one black guy there though and it really confused me.

5) I have to give props to  whoever made the iPod mix for the party though: Black Keys, Kings Of Leon, Spoon, even Parliament Funkadelic ! Oh, wait, maybe it was the black guy.

6)  Wasn't it weird that none of the characters in the first few minutes after the attack ever wondered out loud if it was terrorism? In Manhattan?

Cloverfieldodette_l 7)  Rob's girlfriend Beth? Yes, please.

8) Rob's friend Hud? The guy who mostly did all the filming? SHUT UP!
SHUT UP! SHUT UP! STOP TALKING!

9) My impression of Rob's friend Hud? "Rob, Rob, Rob, Hey Rob, Rob, Rob, Wait up, Rob, Hey Rob, Rob, Rob...."

10) I'm glad I saw it but like most "event" movies, I can't imagine ever wanting to see it again.

What did you think? Please discuss!

 

December 27, 2007

Once

I don't know what goes on at your house but where I live there is a cosmic struggle in progress. It's not quite Sunni-Shiite but it's close. I'm talking about the fight for that first position in the Netflix queue.

If you are still living in 2004 and don't know what Netflix is, here you go: You select the DVDs you wish to rent on the Netflix website and put them in your (checkout) queue. As you return a title, you get sent the next title on your list. So that movie in the top slot it the one you'll be watching this weekend.

We had the time to really work our Netflix account over the holidays. Donna loves the classics: she got both An American In Paris and Singin' In The Rain (I think she's fallen for Gene Kelly all over again).

I get a lot of the foreign films and documentaries and my favorite in the latter category this vacation was Helvetica, all about the evolution of the world's most popular font. "Why can't a graphic designer enjoy a historical movie? All of the fonts are wrong!" That's how typographers roll and you meet a lot of them in this movie.*

Images1_2 The one movie that we watched together that we gave four thumbs up was Once, just out on DVD this month. I saw it in theater over the summer but enjoyed it even more this time and Donna thought it was "charming," "different," and "really good for a Bean pick."

The film is light on plot and dialog - a full 60% of the movie is people singing - but it's ideal for those who like chaste romantic comedies, as well as fans of artists like Damien Rice, David Gray, or Coldplay.


*Think I'm joking about typographers discussing a font for 80 minutes? Here's an audio clip of Helvetica. This will give you some idea of the blistering pace of the film too,