The title of today's post refers to the number of bloggers who, just like predictable ol' me, will be writing about the new film Cloverfield today. It opened yesterday after several weeks of breathless chatter and feverish anticipation.
If you think you might see the film then please come back to this post afterward and add your thoughts but you must STOP READING NOW if you do not want any plot points spoiled.
But for the rest of us now, here are Ten Things I Thought About During Cloverfield.
1) Don't they make tripods for cameras anymore? This largely hand held shot film makes Blair Witch Project look like a still life painting of a bowl of fruit. I know people (Hey, Princess!) who would never survive a screening of this movie with stomach contents intact.
2) Also, where do they sell those video cameras with batteries that last for 24 hours of almost constant stopping and starting shooting?
3) I'm glad I don't get invited to parties like Rob's going away bash because if I walked in the door the average attractiveness of the room would dip 40%. Doesn't that crowd have any friends who are fat? Or just average looking?
4) I did see one black guy there though and it really confused me.
5) I have to give props to whoever made the iPod mix for the party though: Black Keys, Kings Of Leon, Spoon, even Parliament Funkadelic ! Oh, wait, maybe it was the black guy.
6) Wasn't it weird that none of the characters in the first few minutes after the attack ever wondered out loud if it was terrorism? In Manhattan?
7) Rob's girlfriend Beth? Yes, please.
8) Rob's friend Hud? The guy who mostly did all the filming? SHUT UP!
SHUT UP! SHUT UP! STOP TALKING!
9) My impression of Rob's friend Hud? "Rob, Rob, Rob, Hey Rob, Rob, Rob, Wait up, Rob, Hey Rob, Rob, Rob...."
10) I'm glad I saw it but like most "event" movies, I can't imagine ever wanting to see it again.
What did you think? Please discuss!
First, I'm pissed my name didn't make it into the credits. Damn those Producers. I had to fork over money which always makes me mad.
Second, I did have to visit the bathroom after the movie to reduce the nausea load in my stomach. At least, I made it to the bathroom, somebody at my theater left their displeasure right by the doors. Yum!
There were other black guys in the movie. They were depicted as looters.
I wanted to see more of what was going on. I think the battles could have been a lot more exciting if we could have actually seen them. And if you are going to destroy the Brooklyn Bridge, let's get a better shot of that as well.
There were some good creepy shots. I especially liked the trauma care sequence.
As for Hud, I know we don't know where the monster came from. But please stop babbling about it.
Posted by: Greg Lynch | January 19, 2008 at 05:45 AM
I saw it last evening and to quote Public Enemy "Don't believe the hype"
So how is the pig doing?
No, that isn't an euphemism.
Posted by: ARSENAL MF'ers! | January 19, 2008 at 06:33 AM
i give it a 8 out of 10 stars.
Observations:
1. Camera battery life = unbelievable
2. Not once did anyone refer to the thing as "monster", "creature", "dinosaur", "alien" or anything comparable. Only "a terrible thing" or "what the hell is that".
On purpose? Probably.
3. I DID hear someone at the party (I think when they were running down the stairs) say something about this being "another attack"...but that was the extent of it.
4. For all their running around, and Manhattan's almost two million population, I would think that they would've run into more enclaves of people hiding out or trying to escape like they were.
All in all I enjoyed it. (even with the skakey camera work) I let myself get caught up in it and it was a fun ride.
I was only dissapointed that we didn't get more answers to our questions like what exactly happened to the girl who got bit (did she explode? Did something pop out of her chest?) and how did the monster get here? (govt created? alien? crevasse? crevass? ) What exactly IS Cloverfield? (name of government project? Name of new Central Park?) What happened afterward?
I thought it was a pretty original attempt and might see it again one day as soon as my stomach settles down.
Posted by: xtx | January 19, 2008 at 07:27 AM
All I know is I'm glad that it has finally opened so that the onslaught of ads will finally die down.
Posted by: LA | January 19, 2008 at 09:58 AM
The tape was the same length as the duration of the movie, only an hour and a half. Why is the battery life of 90 minutes so unbelievable? My old video camera lasts a good three plus hours.
I distinctly remember hearing "Do you think it's another attack?"
@ xtx :
All we were supposed to know is what was filmed on Rob's camera. Naturally, they weren't going to investigate everything.
The movie succeeded in what they were trying to do.....I personally didn't think it was amazing although it met all of my expectations. It was satisfactory.
7/10
Posted by: Gianni | January 19, 2008 at 12:18 PM
My husband and I just saw it and had a lot of the same thoughts. However, I did hear several people mention thoughts of terrorist attacks...first when they were watching the news, then when they were on the roof. We also wondered where the heck all the millions of New Yorkers were. There were so many times they were all alone. They hopped right on that helicopter, there was no one else there! Couldn't they kick down a few bucks and hire some extras? Speaking of the helicopter, why the hell was it so close to the monster? And I'm sorry, but the acting was pretty unrealistic. You were right about Hud, I wanted to yell at him to shut up about Rob already. However, through those complaints, we did enjoy it and it was a fun movie. It definitely kept me interested and excited for the duration of the film. We were just a little disappointed. I guess that's what to expect with all the hype though.
Posted by: Emily Alexis | January 19, 2008 at 04:06 PM
"breathless chatter and feverish anticipation" - seriously? Man, I'm out of touch.
Posted by: Diane | January 19, 2008 at 05:15 PM
You are so right about only one black person at the party. What New York are they living in?
It reminded me of the tv show "Friends" where it took them seven years to meet Aisha Tyler as their one black friend.
Posted by: Tiny | January 19, 2008 at 05:49 PM
Bean, I stopped reading the post, but wanted to thank you for the spoiler warning. I still haven't forgiven former Daily Show movie reviewer Frank DeCaro for ruining The Sixth Sense for me.
Very considerate Bean!
Posted by: Vic Rattler | January 19, 2008 at 07:37 PM
My son dragged me out to see this movie last night. I was already tired which made the motion sickness kick into high gear. I spent most of the movie with my eyes closed just listening to it. I did catch a glimpse or two of the "monster". All I have to say is that I am glad my son paid for me to "listen" to it.
Posted by: Dierdre Jean | January 19, 2008 at 08:10 PM
Thanks for the warning. A friend of mine grabbed me by the shoulders today and said "YOU must NEVER see this movie."
I love Dramamine, but I think that maybe even *that* won't help this one...
Posted by: Princess Leah | January 20, 2008 at 10:45 PM
I don't like the fact that the movie just ended. I think I would have liked it a lot more if they answered questions.
I need closure. I want to know how & when they killed the monster. Where the monster came from. What actually happened if you got a bite from one of the little monsters, etc.
I did get a little stomach ache but no throwing up.
Posted by: Shandra | January 21, 2008 at 12:27 PM
Finally saw it today and thought it was good.
1. Who goes into a store to buy a battery for a cell phone, pops it into the cell, and it works? You usually have to let it charge for a few hours.
2. When the creature first started attacking, everyone just stood around instead of running...didn't make sense...
3. I give it 8 out of 10. Good movie but the wife fell asleep for most of the flick
Posted by: Raul | January 21, 2008 at 08:06 PM
I loved it & went to see it twice already. I understand what everyone is saying, but I'm happy to have the mystery surrounding it and glad nothing was spelled out. Absolutely my new favorite movie!
Posted by: michelle k | January 22, 2008 at 06:00 AM
3 things that bugged me.
1. I've filmed on a small boat in the gulf stream in 8-foot waves and I was able to keep the camera more still. I honestly think they were told to move the camera around on purpose in Cloverfield, but it was a bit extreme.
2. The beginning of the movie says it was footage found on an intact SD card. So why does the main character flip out and asks, "dude, you're using the wrong TAPE." It's not a tape, and I have actually never seen a digital camcorder that will just record over existing footage like in the movie, as if it WAS a tape. I know it's for the movie and all, but a simple fix would have done it-----just say at the beginning it was all footage found on a tape. I know there were other "holes" in the movie, but usually I can ignore them. Not this time.
3. I liked the movie. But remember how Blair Witch didn't have a script for the actors to read from? Not that their dialogue was award-winning, but in Cloverfield the dialogue felt heavily scripted. Lines like, "that thing back there was trying to pull me away, what do you think that was about," led me along like a toddler.
I know they were going for something different with Cloverfield as a monster movie, and for what it's worth, it worked. But I LOVED the monster itself and the seriousness of the whole event, and it's hard not to think about what they could have done with the movie if they made it more "normal" and hadn't shown it through the "eyes" of a guy having a 90-minute-long seizure.
I love your blog, Bean.
Posted by: Grey | January 22, 2008 at 01:32 PM
I couldn't believe it when Hud, Rob and Beth didn't die in the helicopter crash. I mean, thats a good 20,000 feet drop. And that punctured shoulder didn't affect Beth at all.
Other than that, I thought the movie was pretty good. 7/10
Posted by: rachel | January 22, 2008 at 08:59 PM
I LOVED THIS MOVIE! It was a total physical experience, we went out of our way to go to an exceptional theater with exceptional sound, the sound was incredible, every torpedo, every monster foot step was penetrating my body... i was screaming at the top of my lungs!! cant wait to go again.
by the way, whats up with all the disbelief in the camera batteries, the camera shooting...
ITS A FRIGGIN MONSTER MOVIE!!!
which by the way guys.. monsters dont exist.. why dont you spend more time grappling with the disbelief in that!!
Posted by: heather - long beach, ca | January 23, 2008 at 01:16 PM
i thought it sucked... how can you get impaled on rebar cable and be up and running through manhattan minutes later?
Posted by: mel | January 23, 2008 at 04:33 PM
where did the monster come from?
what happened to the girl who got biten?
well people just need so IMAGINATION! not all the movies have to tell you every single detail of the plot to be a good one! you can make it your own! ppl are jsut to lazzy to think now a days geesh...
yeah there were some stuff that didnt match up or that was IMPOSIBLE but i mean just F.N enjoy the movie and get into it.
Posted by: patsy pineda | January 24, 2008 at 07:48 AM
I loved the movie however, my running commentary throughout was...
1. How did the ENTIRE population of Manhattan evacuate? No one was in the subways, and the brooklyn bridge was out. Am I to believe tat scene where they all lined up single file and marched out of Manhattan?
2. I knew JJ was not going to answer any of my questions ( LOST) so I was just glad at least they showed the monster this time. But wasnt it making the same noise as the 'black smoke' monster in lost?
3. How the hell could they survive a helicopter crash?
4. He got phone reception in a subway tunnel?
Posted by: amber | January 24, 2008 at 03:23 PM
Dude - really, really liked this movie - and, man, is that rare anymore.
To all who complained about the hand held camera shots - please. It's been 20 years on MTV and in movies, can ya get used to it already? Really? Barfing? O.K...
I FULLY respect not telling us what it was. 'The Reason' - 'The Explanation' is always the lamest part of the movie and the scene that generally ruins a film for me.
People were mocking the DRAMATIC MUSIC during the end credits - why? 'cause it's dumb!
To me, this is as NEW and CRAZY as Speilberg's DUEL was - a fresh perspective.
Here's what I do hate about it: so many BORING folk may well rip it off now. All hand held, no 'big shots' - yawn. Ya gotta be making ALIENS meets DAWN OF THE DEAD meets SHAUN OF THE DEAD like they did here to make it interesting.
AND, I think everyone who was ill was more freaked out by the reality-feeling of the movie, not so much the motion...although I'm 100% up for space flight, so maybe I have a cast iron inner ear...
Yer pal, Doug
Posted by: Your Pal Slug | January 29, 2008 at 06:15 PM
I really loved this movie. I thought it looked pretty realistic, of course not 100% flawless; it's still a movie. I knew there were going to be people that were going to complain about it and I would hear comments like "Oh whatever, it wasn't scary." I got a bad headache after from all the motion but still was uber.
Posted by: Cin N. | February 27, 2008 at 04:01 PM
hate hate hate hated it! five minutes into the party scene, and i wanted everyone to die right then. at least i waited for netflix to see it and didn't waste my money on it at a theater.
Posted by: alisa | April 22, 2008 at 10:03 PM